The Biggest Lie About Happiness: Why Life Won’t Be Better “When…”

“Oh, I can see it now… WHEN I accomplish my dreams, goals, and desires, THEN life will be better…”

I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this statement is the biggest lie in human history! It’s a fallacy that completely robs anyone who believes life will be better ‘when’… of the joy of living a life of power, peace, and fulfillment. 

  • “When I get that job that I really covet, then life will be incredible.”
  • “When I win that Championship, then life will be perfect.”
  • “When I meet the love of my life, then life will be complete.”
  • “When I make more money, then I won’t have any worries.”
  • “When I move to a better place than where I’m at, then I’ll be happy.”  

‘When’ and ‘then’ are repeated over and over, like a hamster frantically running on a wheel to nowhere. The sad truth is that most of us completely buy into this as the real key to happiness. We continue to live our lives toward a future of possibilities, instead of realizing that now is all we ever have.

Don’t get me wrong. I truly believe it’s crucial to dream about the life you want and pursue it with all your might. Doing so is the essence of gaining a deeper understanding of who you are and what you can do, and of breaking through the mental barriers that otherwise shackle us to lives of mediocrity and apathy. Living a life with goals and desires allows every day to become a personal masterpiece, knowing you are taking one step closer to your objectives and can look in the mirror at someone you love, respect, and admire.

However, the paradox of all this pursuit of dreams and goals is that once we achieve what we set out to do, we realize there’s nothing really there. As soon as it’s over, aside from relief and maybe a brief sense of achievement, the very next thought that enters our now ‘hungry again’ mind is, “Is this it? What’s next?” And off we go again, just like a hamster. It never stops, and worst of all, we now see that the joy we thought we’d find in the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow has just moved again.

If this is true, then where is the joy? Where do fulfillment and happiness reside? Where is the freedom to live with reckless abandon and revel in childlike exuberance? The answer lies within you. It lies in the statement that ‘life is lived forward…and understood backward’. It is realizing that it is not what you get in victorious triumph but rather who you become in the process of its achievement.

I believe our fulfillment resides in the journey when we become aware of it and accept it. It is the ability to find joy and peace in every moment we are fortunate enough to be alive—truly alive—and to notice the moments that take our breath away. To love intensely, laugh out loud at the humor of this thing called life, cry in both pain and happiness, and, most importantly, be grateful for all of it. Fulfillment isn’t in ‘yesterday’ or ‘tomorrow’ but in the precious present called ‘today’. 

I recently launched my second book, ‘LARGER THAN LIFE, In Pursuit of Discovering Your Full Potential.’ When you read my book, you’ll understand this post and its relevance to your journey of discovering your full potential. If not, just wait until book number three… then all will be better… until we do it all again ;-).

With nothing but love and gratitude for you. 

Be Larger Than…

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